Saturday, April 29, 2006
MY STORY PART TWO
On January 23, I sent $325 to the Coleman Agency to make contact with my birthmother. I called Catrina to let her know that I have done this. She said it would take up to two months for everything to come together. On January 26, I got the call. As I have said in a previous post, it was a connection made and lost. The rest of this story is what was in my adoption file. When she found out that she was pregnant with me, a doctor recommended the agency to her. He even called the agency and advised them that she was coming out there. She initially visited on her own. She also told the agency that she was going to let the father adopt me. The agency told her that they didn't do that kind of adoption but could recommend an agency that could. The adoption agency also stated that they could not go through any adoption unless she told her parents about her pregnancy. She later came back with her mother. She stated the same thing about my father adopting me. It was all read to me minus names and some dates. I do know that my birthmother's birthday is between June 7, 1943 and July 30, 1943. There was a birthday celebrated with two birthday cakes. That right there confounds me. She also named me Michelin. Another thing that confounds me. It was an unusual name in itself. Back to my story. She entered the home on June 7, 1965. When they went to examine her, she freaked out and wouldn't let them do it. It was then decided that she and her family would go through therapy. That was definitely unusual because it just wasn't done. I do know that her father had an emotional breakdown sometime before all of this happened. In order to do this therapy, she had to give her family adequate warning since they lived some distance away. It was my understanding about 100 miles away or an hour or so away. They described her as being very beautiful but with sharp features. She also had a small upper lip. She had brown hair, brown eyes, and wore glasses. She also had some college. It was either at a junior college or three years of college and a junior in college. She states that she was working at an insurance company in Indianapolis. That is where she says that she met my birthfather. She was asked if she wanted to hold me. She refused. She also mentions going back to an old boyfriend. Her father was a impressive man that was clean cut and well dressed. Her mother was dressed rather frumpy and didn't take good care of her looks. My great-grandmother mentions too that her mother didn't take very good care of the home. Both of my grandparents were from coal mining families. This right here is a clue for me. In most coal mining families this occupation goes from generation to generation. So something made my grandfather find a job outside the norm. I am assuming that the coal mines had shut down. The coal mines in Indiana did just that in the thirties. He worked at a tire company/plant. His wife complained that he would choose the plant over his family when it came to problems. All of the family had brown hair and brown eyes except for one of her brothers who had blue eyes. She had one sister who was 17 at the time of my birth, a brother who was 13 and blue eyes, and a brother who was 7 at the time of my birth. Her 13 year old brother was involved in a math and science program. Evidently one of the inherited traits of the family is the strength in mathematics and science. I most definitely have that trait. Her father is described as also being very hard and harsh on her. They initially threw her out of the family. They also disowned her. Her father was particularly hard on her. Her sister seemed to fight back with her dad. Her sister didn't have near the problems with him as she did. She also had a friendly relationship with her sister and brothers. It was also decided that her father would not be told who the father was. She and her mother both stated that her father would "kill" him. So I think that her father knew the man. My grandfather was English with a little bit of Irish in him. My grandmother was all English. My father was English as well. He was also a truckdriver. He was also from Texas. He was 38 at this time. He was married with one child living. He and his wife had three other children who died at birth with no joints/limbs and blind. His wife was told not to have anymore children. I think the first three children were boys. It was thought to have been a rH factor thing. I was a lab tech in the Army and have a blood bank manual. RH factor has nothing to with this kind of situation. I believe that this was a sex-related genetic defect. This was his first time affair. According to the records, he was a very kind and gentle man. At the time of the visit with her mother, my birthfather was really applying pressure for her to give me to him. From here it gets a little fuzzy. He at some point went to his wife and told her of the affair. He also told her that I was the result of that affair. I am sure that the conversation between them was very interesting and I can only guess what that was. His wife too then wanted to adopt me. She states that it isn't about the affair but about the child, me. I think somewhere in here my birthmother changed her mind about giving me to him. She went to Coleman to have me. The record does state he pleaded, begged, and tried coercing her into giving me to him. I think she had hopes that he would leave his wife. I think she was disappointed when he didn't. I don't know if my adoption to another couple was her punishment to him. When I was born her family came down. She still didn't hold me. Her family did interact with me. In fact, her youngest brother began to regress. She left the home on August 9,1965. On December 20, 1965 my birthfather called back and asked if I was still available for adoption. He was told that I was not. By that time my family and I was on our way to Fort Polk, Louisiana. After two and half years, we moved to his home state of Texas. My new birth record was filed on August 18, 1965. So the adoption was finalized sometime in there. Next the transcript from the two phone calls. Catrina called once and my birthmother called back.