NEW JERSEY CATHOLIC CONFERENCE

BIRTH PARENT FACT OR FICTION SHEET

MYTH: Birth parents never signed a confidentiality agreement when they placed their babies for adoption. Since there was nothing in writing ensuring confidentiality, birth mothers/fathers don’t expect it.

FACT: There is, indeed, something in writing. Birth parents in New Jersey were and are guaranteed confidentiality by statute N.J.S.A. 26:8-40.1 and N.J.S.A. 9:3-52. Birth parents surrendered their children with actual statutory assurances that their identities as parents would be shielded from any disclosure.

The times have changed. State Appellent Courts and Supreme Courts have all finally seen through the fallacies of these types of laws. When several highly respected organizations all state that a majority of birth parents want contact with their children, are you ever going to stop and listen? When one of the world's best resources for information on adoption, the Evan B. Donaldson Institute, states 90% of birth mothers want contact with their children, are you ever going to change your mind? We are now standing up and speaking very very loudly. WE WILL NOT BE SILENCED ANY LONGER BY YOUR RELIGIOUS, HATEMONGERING AND DECEPTIVE LIES ANY LONGER. WE WILL NOT BE SHAMED INTO SILENCE. WE HAVE VOICES AND WE WILL BE HEARD.

MYTH: Most birth parents want to be contacted.

LIKE DUH IN A MAJOR WAY......

FACT: There is absolutely no evidence to support this argument. Many birth parents may wish to be contacted by their adult adopted children. Many others do not. That certain birth parents want to be reunited with their children is no reason to breach the privacy rights of all birth parents by opening adoption records.

HEY DIMWITS CHECK OUT THE EVAN B. DONALDSON WEBSITE. BETTER YET CHECK OUT ORIGINS-USA, CONCERNED UNITED BIRTHPARENTS, AND THE MANY MANY OTHERS THAT DISPROVE YOUR BULL SHIT

MYTH: Birth parents have no "right to privacy" if their adult adopted children want to contact them. WE HAVE NEVER SAID THERE IS NO RIGHT TO PRIVACY CONCERNING CONTACT. WHAT WE WANT IS OUR RECORDS.

FACT: Birth parents do have a right to privacy. This right to be left alone is expressly assured by the provisions of N.J.S.A. 26:8-40.1 and N.J.S.A. 9:3-52. The constitutional right to privacy has also been recognized as a vital interest by the U.S. Supreme Court. The New Jersey statutes which seal adoption records protect the right to privacy not only of the birth parents but also of the adopted child and the adoptive parents. RIGHT TO PRIVACY IN THIS INSTANCE WAS IN REGARDS TO HAVING A PRIVATE MEDICAL PROCEDURE DONE. THE RIGHT TO PRIVACY IS ABOUT PROTECTING A WOMAN'S REPRODUCTIVE HEALTH.

It is true that the right to privacy is not absolute. Recognizing this, the New Jersey Legislature provided in N.J.S.A. 9:3-52 that, if there is good cause such as the need to have access to medical histories, a court may order that the birth records be revealed. This statute gives the courts the power to weigh and balance the competing rights of the birth parent and the adult adoptee and make a determination based on the facts and circumstances of each individual case.
I HAVE HEARD STORIES OF ADOPTEES BEING ON THEIR DEATH BEDS AND STILL BEING DENIED ACCESS. SO MUCH FOR THAT. PEOPLE LIKE YOU WANT US ADOPTEES TO STAY FOREVER CHILDREN SORRY WE DO GROW UP. WE ARE ENTITLED TO INFORMATION CONCERNING OUR BIRTHS . DON'T YOU HAVE ACCESS TO YOUR BIRTH CERTIFICATE. BECAUSE WE ARE ADOPTEES, BIRTH PARENTS, AND ADOPTIVE PARENTS, WE ARE LESS IN YOUR EYES. WE ARE JUST THE BUCK THAT YOU MAKE OF OUR BACKS. YOU DON'T WANT US TO SEE THE RECORDS AND WHAT YOU HAVE WRITTEN IN THEM. YOU WOULD GET SUED FOR THE HORRIBLE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE TO US OVER THE YEARS.

MYTH: The rights of adult adoptees to information supersedes the rights of birth parents to privacy. AGAIN YOU ARE NOT GETTING IT. ARE YOU BOUND BY A CONTRACT MADE ABOUT YOU IN YOUR BEST INTERESTS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? NO NOR WOULD YOU ENTER SUCH A CONTRACT. LET ALONE ALLOW ANY MEMBER OF YOUR FAMILY ENTER SUCH A CONTRACT

FACT: Even if there is a personal right to receive important information, it is not absolute. It must be balanced against the need to safeguard the legitimate claim of privacy of persons who would be affected by disclosure. The rights of adult adoptees must be balanced against the rights of birth parents, which is exactly what the law now provides by the court procedures set forth above in N.J.S.A. 9:3-52.

THE FACT IS THIS. BIRTH PARENTS RELINQUISH THEIR RIGHTS. THE ADOPTION RECORDS WERE SEALED AFTER THE ADOPTION WAS COMPLETE, NOT AT RELINQUISHMENT. ADOPTIVE PARENTS NO LONGER CONTROL US AFTER WE ADOPTEES REACH MAJORITY. DO YOUR PARENTS CONTROL YOUR BIRTH CERTIFICATE? NO THEY DON'T. YET WE AS ADOPTEES HAVE TO HAVE THAT PUT UPON US BECAUSE WE WERE ADOPTED.


MYTH: Birth parents should bring their past out into the open and not keep secrets.

AGAIN ACCESS TO OUR BIRTH RECORDS IS NOT ABOUT FORCING BIRTH PARENTS TO FACE THINGS IN THEIR PAST. IT IS ABOUT OUR RECORDS. IT IS ABOUT HAVING A PIECE OF PAPER THAT ACTUALLY AND FACTUALLY RECORDS OUR BIRTH. IN FACT BIRTH CERTIFICATES SHOULD HAVE BOTH SETS OF NAMES ON IT. OTHERWISE IT IS A FALSIFIED DOCUMENT. IT IS A STATE SANCTIONED LIE AS AN AMENDED BIRTH CERTIFICATE.

FACT: Whether or not to maintain confidentiality is a personal choice and should not be forced upon anyone. In many cases, for whatever reason, the birth parent has chosen not to reveal to his or her spouse, children or other relations the facts of the birth which took place 18 or more years ago. Having been assured of confidentiality by statute and having lived their lives in reliance on that confidentiality, birth parents should not now be compelled against their will to reveal their past.

YOU AS THE SOCIAL SERVICES, MEDICAL SERVICES AND RELIGIOUS SERVICES MADE PROMISES THAT YOU ARE ASKING AND EVEN TRYING TO FORCE THE STATE TO KEEP. THE STATE DID NOT MAKE THESE PROMISES TO THESE WOMEN. YOU DID. YOU MADE THEM WHEN 90% OF THESE WOMEN DID NOT WANT YOU TO MAKE THEM. YOU USE THESE PROMISES TO HIDE THE COERCION, LIES, AND CORRUPTION YOU INFLICTED UPON THESE WOMEN. ARE YOU TRYING TO HIDE TO KEEP YOURSELVES FROM GETTING SUED? SURE AS HELL SOUNDS LIKE IT TO ME. EVEN ADOPTIVE PARENTS ARE BEGINNING TO SEE YOU FOR WHAT YOU ARE - CORRUPT AND EVIL.

IT SEEMS LIKE A MAJORITY OF YOU DO NOT READ THE BIBLE. EVERY ADOPTEE IN THE BIBLE DOES EVENTUALLY RETURN TO HIS ORIGINAL FAMILY. REMEMBER THAT. WE LOVE OUR ADOPTIVE FAMILIES AND WE LOVE OUR ORIGINAL FAMILIES. GET OUT OF OUR PANTIES, JOCK STRAPS, PURSES AND WALLETS. LET US LIVE OUR LIVES THE WAY WE CHOOSE. IT AIN'T NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS ANYWAY.