How many adoptees hate their birthdays? I know that I do. I have so many doubts about my birthday. There isn't a damn thing that I can do about it. After rereading The Baby Thief, I wondered with so many black market children now adults out there why are records sealed. I know in Georgia Tann's case that it was to cover the money.
I had a conversation with my own adoptive mother today. I spent half of my conversation telling her that yes she is my mother. I finally got a little fed up. Whether or not my natural mother chooses to recognize me or not, I am very much a part of her. I want my adoptive family to understand that. It hurts bad enough that my natural mother can't or won't acknowledge me but to have my adoptive family do that makes it so worse. I told my adoptive mother that my search is at the end of the road. I have to change the laws in Indiana in order to get some closure for myself. I have to change them to prevent others from feeling this horrible nagging at my soul.
I have discovered many things about the Suemma Coleman Home for Unwed Mothers. They didn't give adoption paperwork to the adoptive parents. That makes a person wonder what were they hiding. Paperwork was not finalized until close to a year later. I am having to explain to her over and over that agency was not the best. They were no better than any other agency. It makes me very suspicious that they didn't get paperwork. It makes me wonder if I am a Black Market baby undiscovered. Why didn't they give them paperwork?
Then of course discovering that they tortured the women there was horrifying too. They tied the women to their beds so that they couldn't touch their stomachs. They knocked them out at the last minute to keep them from discovering what the sex was of their baby. If I ever find out that I am half Indian, I will raise hell with the agency. They are required by law to reveal my information to me.
So many screw ups, thanks to Georgia Tann. So many legalized lies. When will it ever stop?