Saturday, October 18, 2008


As I read this story, I am sickened by the thoughts behind it. It comes down to sex. It always does. You see I am the product when a couple has sex and gets pregnant as a result without the benefit of marriage. I am that child, only now I am all grown up.

Sex is normal and is part of our history and part of who we are as humans. It is natural. However I have some serious issues with the way that we humans treat sex in our society. Having sex comes with serious responsibility. Our society is just too flip about it. Our society is just too flip about women and children. Sad thing is that we women and children suffer even more so as a result.

Everyday I am reminded of adoption. I step outside my home and I am reminded of what it has done to me. I live on a ranch. On this ranch, I see the importance of genetics in the horses, livestock, our pets, and the other animals around us.

The horses are bred for certain characteristics. The ranch horse is unique in itself. The qualities that we look for are many. Easy going temperment. The ability to watch cows. The ability to cut cattle. The ability to prowl a pasture without being spooked easily. Confirmation which is the body build and size of a horse. Attitude. These horses are bred for these reasons. When you look at their documentation you will see at least three generations listed.

The ranch also has a 60% herd for hereford cattle. We have a blend of angus/hereford and brangus/hereford mix in the remaining fourty percent. The heritage is important for the survival of this ranch. Every cow, bull and calf too has their documentation.

We respect the breeding lines and the documentation in livestock. However we don't in humans. I honestly think that the horses and livestock are treated better than we treat our own humanity. I remember a time when a cowboy lost his temper with a horse. People turned their backs on him. This was rightly so. I was furious with him myself.

Sex education would help in the changing of attitudes. It is not enough. Our children are our future. I believe that abortion and adoption has hurt our nation. It has denied away parenthood. Just like slavery has done to African Americans. There are situations that warrant it but the era of mass surrender is a perfect example of it.

Sex is a wonderful experience but with it comes serious responsibility. We owe it to our children to take that responsibility with the gravity it deserves.


Anonymous said...

I hope you understand that marriage has very little to do with the responsibility of parenthood. Not all single couples surrender their children for adoption or separate and leave mom and child alone.

Marriage has legal and financial benefits, this is true, but the emotional and moral responsibilities are strong in any committed relationship.

My parents were married before my sister was conceived, but shortly after they divorced. On the other hand, I have a good friend who has never been married and she and her partner have 3 children together. They have been with each other for 15 years.

And on the whole, it's my married friends who have the biggest problems.

I think the difference between my marriage and my friends' is that we were friends first, lived together first, and love each other as people. There aren't any expectations to be a perfect spouse.

Amyadoptee said...

Nope I was not talking marriage. I was talking about sex. Just sex and facts. It happens marriage pretty much the same way.

I guess I should have more specific. Women's bodies are held to this higher standard whereas women themselves are not. Its a really weird double standard. Men's bodies are not held to this higher standard but men themselves are still given priority to do with as they wish.

Every notice how a woman's eggs are considered precious by our society but sperm is not? It takes both to create a child. Our country is willing to violate the rights of a woman to get to her ovaries and uterus.

If we hold women accountable then we should do the same to men. Men these days get too much of a free ride.

The Improper Adoptee said...

I hear you Amy and I agree totally. Sex is just not about having a good time, not when it could involve later an innocent person, as in an infant. Kids need to be taught today that sex is like driving a car-it is a responsibility-driving isn't just about going out on joy rides, and thinking you are are cool, a car is a deadly weapon, and can hurt or kill someone-having sex and creating a human being can hurt or kill that child too if the child is aborted or Adopted.